Giving thanks, a day later

Well, I missed the boat on a Thanksgiving post. It's been a little wild and crazy around here, as I get ready to go to London - we leave tomorrow. There's been so much leading up to this day, so I am ready to get on with it. It's funny how I never seem to learn that the worst part of anticipating a big event is - the anticipation. While I've definitely had my days, this time round I feel calmer. I even managed to pack my bags without overflow; husband looked at them and said, I don't think you're taking enough. Seriously. So after years of being an overpacker, I was delighted at my progress.

Anyhow, better a day late than never to reflect on gratitude. We were fortunate enough to spend Thanksgiving dinner with my Cowgirl Yoga partner Janice and her family, which helped us feel like we didn't get totally cheated out of the holiday by planning to depart for six months 2 days later. Other things I'm giving thanks for this year:

• My family's health. A good friend just said to me in an email, "health is key, and so taken for granted by the healthy, isn't it?" It's so easy to get swooped up in our daily dramas and take them all so very seriously, when serious illness isn't affecting you or yours. Husband's sibling has colon cancer that recently spread, and our Cowgirls vs. Cancer program reminds me often to be thankful for good health; reminders to keep my own daily drama in check.
• Lessons from my little one. I blogged about this recently, but the learnings continue, particularly during my pre-London fog...my 5 year old daughter is handling this upcoming transition with the utmost grace, and the ability to live in the moment. On Tuesday, her last day of school, they had a special goodbye celebration for her; I arrived in time to watch the kids in her class all line up to give her a hug, one by one. I was the one in tears with the goodbyes; the entire way home, she talked about what each child said to her and who she wanted to send postcards to. Talk about beautiful closure.
• The opportunity for adventure, and to expand beyond my comfort zones. It's been easy to get caught up in a feeling of pre-London panic: but I'm comfortable here! I like my life! We just did a major move (from DC to Montana in 2007) not that long ago! So then I have to remind myself: how often does life present this kind of opportunity, to live abroad and explore the culture and history (and yoga) that a place like London has to offer? Some of it isn't easy or fun - for example, we don't have a place to live yet, ACK! - but it will all balance out and I know we will be fine.

I'm a believer in signs. This morning as I was headed into town for a whirlwind of errands, feeling the stress of our last day in the States for awhile, my daughter yelled from the backseat, ELK! There was a gorgeous herd of elk bedded down in the snow, enjoying the sunshine we haven't seen in a few very snowy days. This kind of sight always takes my breath away, and reminds me how to live in the moment. So lastly, I am thankful for the elk. Next post from London. Namaste.

Ode to Dude

And today, another part of the transition...I took advantage of the slight lull in the winter weather to get in a last ride on my Dude Boy. Even if I wasn't going to London, my riding would trickle off as I usually dedicate my winter training and recreation time to both alpine and Nordic skiing...but the fact that I am going to be so far away from him is tugging at my heart strings a bit. So, today is an Ode to Dude, my sweet gentle giant.

Thank you from the bottom of my heart for:

• carrying me on your back safely on some wild, crazy and beautiful trail rides - taking me places I may not have been able to go by myself
• your never-ending patience and gentle manners with my 5 year old daughter, who also loves you more than you can know and dreams about you at night
• showing me the meaning of the horse-human connection
• being my therapist, my childhood fantasy come true, and the equine love of my life
• and last but not least, the many lessons in how to live by these words: Yeehaw and Namaste.

Photos by Lauren Brown

Snowstorms and shifts

It's definitely a transition time. All of a sudden, last Monday to be exact, we went straight from the perfect fall into winter. We got a significant snowstorm, and another is on the way tonight. It was almost 70 degrees one day, and the next, snowstorm. I've always adored the drama of this kind of shift; it's sort of thrilling. I'm trying hard not to resist a similar shift happening in my personal life as we prepare to head to London for the winter. Although it's a temporary move and we'll be back home in Montana in the spring, there is so damn much to do. And I'm still waking up in the night wondering about things like, how will I get presents from Santa for my daughter, if she won't be in school and is going to be with me the entire month of December?! I know, I could have worse things to worry about.

Life brings change. How many people have put pen to paper on this theme over the centuries? The weather's changed, we're shifting from riding season into ski season (even though I'll be missing the latter, boo!), my family is shifting its home to a faraway place. Every time I start to panic, I remind myself how much angst comes from the anticipation of change. If we just live it, like Nike says, just do it, it's so much better. I'm tapping into my yoga practice for some of that inspiration, and looking forward to shifting from teaching into focusing completely on my own practice for the time we are away. More to come on my London yoga adventures (and otherwise), I'm sure.

Pictured above are the Bridger mountains after last week's storm, all pretty in pink. Click on the image to enlarge for the full p.i.p. effect.

And the day came when the risk to remain tight in the bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.

-Anais Nin

Shout out from Yoga Dork!

This just made my day - one of my fave yoga blogs, Yoga Dork, mentioned Cowgirl Yoga today: Yoga with Horses! The Wild World of the Moving Yoga Mat. Thanks YD, Yeehaw and Namaste to you.

Life Lessons from a 5 year old

The whole UK school thing is looking murky for my 5 year old (can't say I blame them - perhaps having a child blow into the classroom for a few months isn't conducive to stability), so I'm practicing my home-schooling skills...and it's not like learning some English history and the travel itself won't be a fantastic opportunity to educate. As she sits with me in our office, working on writing her letters, I was thinking about some of the lessons she has given me. The simple, yet really effective things we tend to forget as adults. For example:

• Sleep when you are tired. I've tried really hard to teach her to recognize this; I'll take credit for doing it myself, despite the ridicule I've had to endure for going to bed early (I'm not even going to tell you how early it can be sometimes). And most days, I feel fabulous. And sometimes, I need a reminder that it's worth it to just go to bed; tomorrow is a new day.
• Wear your emotions on your sleeve. We may not have the emotional freedom as adults to always say what we are really feeling - but how many times do we stifle it, and lose the opportunity to honestly embrace our emotions, because we are scared of what might happen? My daughter has to learn that calling someone a "butthead" isn't the best way to express she is upset, but we find another way for her to do so.
• Take a break when you need it. She just told me her hand was tired and stopped mid-alphabet. Now how many adults would have just plowed through so they could check it off the to-do list? Sometimes a rest in between the work provides perspective.
• Ask lots of questions. Don't just accept, Ask. Be as educated as possible. I don't have all the answers to everything my daughter asks, and sometimes I can't even explain things in terms a 5 year old can understand ("Mom? What happened to the American Indians?") but she keeps me on my toes and encourages me to investigate more.
• Drink lots of milk. She got this from me too. I do love my evening glass of vino, but some nights when I pour her glass of milk with dinner I find I must indulge too.

The other night, we were relaxing before bed, reading and talking. I closed my eyes, and she reached over and I felt her fingertips on my third eye. In perfect Sanskrit, she softly chanted my favorite blessing, Lokah Samastah Sukhino Bhavantu - may all beings everywhere be happy and free. She finished with OM shanti, three times. I used to do this for her when she was a baby to soothe her. Lesson learned, I guess. Here's my little devil last weekend at Halloween.

(En)Lighten Up

Yes, I know, it's the name of a movie about yoga culture that I still need to see...but I've been feeling heavy lately, like some unseen weight is pressing down upon me (perhaps it's this: OMG OMG omg we are leaving for London in a few weeks and I have so much to do!! So much so, that I've stalled in 'deer in the headlights' mode because I don't even know where to start!). So, I started with cleaning out my email, that previously took up about 100MB of memory. I always blew this annoying task off, thinking that I've got much more important things to do, like send and receive more emails...but the pressure is on now that I need to shift my online life to a laptop for London. Want to start fresh too, you know? And once I got started I couldn't stop. I've made it up to this year (don't ask where I started) and I feel about 10 pounds lighter.

As I deleted away, I revisited so many different people, places and situations that at the time seemed über important, and have now faded. Oh the drama! And I started to feel like I've come a long way, baby. All these things that I lost so much sleep over now merely brought an amused smile to my face. Is this a sign of maturity? Or is it just that the dramas have shifted to new people, places and situations? Perhaps a little of both, but there were definitely recurring themes throughout the email years...my not-so-stellar personality traits shining through. Who needs therapy when you can clean out your email?? And what at first appeared to be an odious, time-consuming task shifted into a way to enlighten up. I'm pretty pleased with my super light inbox, not to mention gaining perspective and getting rid of baggage with the touch of a key.

Not sure if this adds weight to my enlightening up, but I also got my hair cut today. Went from long and lackluster to short and sleek. Maybe no added significance, but it doesn't hurt to feel like you look good.

How do you enlighten up?